There’s a place for that …

I really do love Second Life and for me, as for many, it’s a life-line. My real life work means that I rarely get to see a soul, and that means I get lonely, despite my lovely husband. Second Life affords me the chance to get out and about virtually and to learn new things. My Primary gets to socialise too, so it’s very important to me as a substitute for something I can’t have in the real world right now.

Just like the real world, Second Life attracts all types of people and there is a place for them all. Even “those” ones. However, just like the real world, knowing how to behave when you are out of your niche is important for everyone’s benefit. It seems that a lot of people see SL as a game only, and think that means they may behave as they wish and it’s perfectly acceptable to do so. “Get a life!” is their response, should you disagree with their point of view. The thing is, many can’t “get a life”. There are hundreds of people on Second Life because they are disabled or infirm – stuck at home for all manner of reasons and this virtual world is their life. Spending a lot of time in any game is no real substitute for getting out in the real world, but if you don’t have that option, why should you have what life you can get virtually ruined by other’s behaviour?

Apart from the obvious gripes of griefers, racialism, sexism and general bad behaviour, my pet peeve is that a number of both genders seem to think that it’s acceptable to go into a shop or other public place in a General or Moderate SIM and ask for sex with the first avatar they find appealing. You know what – in some SIMs it is acceptable. So why don’t these people go there?

I have clocked how long it takes for someone to hit on me when I’m in a shop, genuinely trying to buy an item. I’m no model, but it happens at least 50% of the time, possibly more. I’m just in a shop, looking at vendors and checking prices. I haven’t spoken to a soul except to say “excuse me” if I landed on them when teleporting or “I’m sorry” if lag bumped me into them. So why is it that I have been asked via Instant Message (IM) in less than 30 seconds (truly), if I want to go to bed with someone?

It usually starts like this …

THEM: “Hello!”

ME: “Hi. Can I help you?”

THEM: “Oh, you look very pretty! I just thought we could chat.”

ME: “Thank you for the compliment. I’m just shopping, was there something in particular that you wanted to chat about?”

THEM: “Well, maybe we could go for a walk?”

ME: “I’m just shopping and then I’m going home …”

THEM: “But we could –”

ME: “… to my husband.”


Or alternatively (and this happened!)

THEM: “Hello.”

ME: “Hi. Can I help you?”

THEM: “Nice t*ts. Fancy a sh*g?”

Who actually thinks that a conversation as short as either of these would lead to the bedroom? Would you do this in a shop in real life? More to the point, did you read my profile which said I was married and that I was not interested in intimate encounters (yes, you need to specify both in Second Life).

Peri’s Tips for a nicer Second Life:

  1. Don’t try to pick up people in shops, or other public places, unless it’s in that type of SIM. There’s a place for that.
  2. Read your target’s profile. Twice. It will tell you if they want intimate encounters or if they want to pretend they don’t but do (!). There’s a place for that.
  3.  Brush up on your winning lines. The second example is unlikely to win the panties and it certainly won’t win the heart. If you want to use a meaningless, unoriginal and frankly insulting* way of hitting on someone, guess what … ?
    There’s a place for that …

Should you want to know where to find these places, use your Search option on your viewer and type in something blunt. “Sex” will keep your Search going for hours and you’ll find things that will scare you into never doing it again. Or you’ll find the place for that. I can assure you, that place is not with me.

My final tip to people that think it’s a good idea to hit on me randomly:

“Silence is one of the great arts of conversation.”
Marcus Tullius Cicero

*Yes, it is insulting. I’m flattered you like my t*ts, but assuming that telling me so will make me hot for you is an insult to my intelligence and an assumption that I have no more control over my libido … than YOU.

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